I’ve been absent for about a week. Unfortunately I received some news that has been a little difficult to digest. So today’s post won’t include a recipe. It will however include ramblings from me about some things I know now…that I wish I knew before.
As children we resent our parents for protecting us from growing up. We want to be independent. We want to do what we want, when we want to. And as we grow up, and responsibility falls at our feet, suddenly we start to acknowledge why our parents tried so hard to protect us. We have our whole lives to be adults. We have so few years to live innocently before the reality of what life is sets in. And as parents (from what I imagine, since I am not a parent yet) we want our children to bask in the gift of innocence.
*I wish I knew when I was younger how lucky I was to have parents that wanted me to be a kid for as long as possible.*
As children, most of us are at some point are completely mortified by our parents in situations as simple as a mother counting out change while going through the drive-through. (OK. Maybe this was me, but I remember being horrified that my mom would dig through her purse trying to find change instead of just handing the person behind the window a $5.)
Me: MOM. SERIOUSLY. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?????
Mom: Honey, I just need to get rid of this change.
Me: You’re holding up the line! Come on! (huff. eye roll. cross arms. pout.)
*I wish I knew how annoying it is to have a purse full of change.*
Holding a Starbucks cup became a cool thing when I was in middle-school. For a treat my mom would occasionally take me in the afternoon to grab a coffee. When her latte would appear at the counter, without a doubt this conversation would take place:
Mom: Are you sure this is decaf?
Barista: Yes, ma’am.
Mom: I don’t want to be up later. I can’t have too much caffeine late in the day.
Barista: It’s definitely decaf, ma’am.
Mom: OK. Well I just wanted to double-check.
Me: (mortified. huff. eye roll. cross arms. pout.)
*I wish I knew that when I turned 29 suddenly caffeine after 2pm would keep me up until 4am and that I would be having the above conversation with many a barista.*
I have a quick tongue. A very quick tongue. And when I was younger it got me in a lot of trouble. There were times when I said really mean things to my parents.
*I wish I knew that my parents do indeed have feelings and that my words had the capability of hurting them.*
When I was in middle-school my mom and dad tried to hug me. A lot. Hugging my parents when I was 13 just wasn’t on my radar of coolness. Growing up my dad and I always did pick-up hugs, where my dad would literally pick me up and give me a giant bear hug. Needless to say at 13 I’m pretty sure I took the year off of pick-up hugging.
*I wish I knew that at 29 I would still be asking my dad for pick-up hugs. I wish I could get back that year of lost pick-up hugs. I also wish I knew that at 29 I’d be asking my mother for double-extended hugs.*
I used to HATE leftovers and roasted chicken. My mom was the queen of leftovers and roasted chicken.
*I wish I knew that I would grow up to adore leftovers and roasted chicken. Two items that make weeknight meals a cinch!*
My parents did buy me a car in high-school, but not exactly the coolest car. At first I was embarrassed to drive ol’ blue around. But then I embraced it – though i I always secretly (and sometimes not so secretly) wanted something fancier. My parents always helped me, but they never really handed me an easy life on a silver platter. At times I truly resented them for this.
*I wish I knew at the time my parents were teaching me how to be independent and self-sufficient. If I wanted something more than they were willing to give, I needed to find a way to pay for it myself. I also wish I knew that my parents were teaching me to value experiences over materialistic objects. I will always be grateful to them for this.*
My mom likes to gamble occasionally at the slots – the nickel slots. I always thought this was ridiculous, until she won 5,000 nickels. Recently I was in Atlantic City for a work trip and in the evening hit the nickel slots where I won 2,059 nickels. I was beyond excited and wanted to tell my parents. My mom was in Israel at the time so I called my dad. After getting off of the phone with him I realized that every time something exciting in life happens I want to call and tell my parents. I immediately emailed him and asked him how it’s possible that he and mom raised two children, one who is in his 30’s, who want to chat with their parents every time something good happens.
*I wish I knew that I would want to raise kids that will want the same relationship with me that I have with my parents. I would have taken better notes when I was younger instead of eye rolling, huffing and arm crossing.*
This list could go on and on. And over the next little while I might post a few other simple things I wish I knew. But most importantly – I’m so glad I know now just how damn lucky I am to have the parents that I do.